Overcoming My Hypersexuality

Photo by Geoff

There was a time I was hypersexual.
I found love in all the wrong places.
The clubs and bars.
Through apps as well.
I got myself into a lot of trouble.
I had sex with a lot of people.
I got a STI.
And thank God it was a curable one.
Cured with just a few tablets.
I blamed myself for getting a STI.
I then blamed the men I slept with.
I was easily seduced.
And then I go and put all the blame back on me.
Then the men again.
It was definitely a vicious cycle.
I know why I slept with so many people.
I thought that if I give myself sexually, I would get approval from the other person/guy.
Because I didn’t know my worth in these sexual relationships.
During this hypersexual time, I was feeling worthless.
I was feeling I wasn’t enough.
And yet I would go find someone to sleep with.
To get validation.
To get approval.
So how did I overcome this hypersexuality?
It started with myself.
It started on how I see my worth.
And how I see that I am enough.
Who I am now.
The moment I told myself that I was enough and know my worth - that’s when the sky became clearer.
But getting the STI was also a big wakeup call.
It was a big lesson for me.
Learning to say NO to sex was something I learnt.
Learning to say NO to my current partner when I don’t feel like having sex.
Consent is super important.
Before meeting my soul mate, and I was having flings; I made sure I always had condoms in my bag too.
There were a few occasions the guy wanted to have sex without condoms.
Because he ‘wanted to feel it’.
But.
I stood up for myself.
I said no condom, then go home.
That was when I started feeling empowered.
I know how to protect myself emotionally, mentally, and sexually now.
I hope this blogpost shines a light for young girls and women.
You are perfect the way you are.
You are imperfectly perfect.
Accept yourself as you are.
You don’t need to get approval and validation from another person.
And if I can say, pls learn from my actions if yet anything.